Posted in coronavirus, Covid-19, dating, Health, news, relationships, sex

Is Coronavirus Killing Your Sex Life?

As Americans grapple with community lockdowns amid the coronavirus epidemic, those who are single, and not single, find COVID-19 to be devastatingly cramping their style.

In some cities, bars, restaurants, and movie theaters are shuttered, so options for a first date become slim.

Clubs and gyms are closed, impeding the casual run in or bump into to someone new.

And salons for hair and nails may be closed, being “non essential”, hence at home beauty regimens need to tackle overgrown nails and roots, resulting in a “hibernation” during the lockdown if one’s unsuccessful.

And for those using dating sites for strictly hook-ups, “social distancing” can be a challenge in any bedroom.

Married people don’t have it that much easier…..spending 24 hours a day at home together rarely makes the heart grow fonder…..

So America’s sex life may be locking down faster than stores shuttering.

But there are options……lot’s of them. Let’s look at these…

Virtual “Sex”

Assuming you have a secure server, many conversations and expressions of desire can be conveyed online. Keep in mind apps like “Zoom” do not imply image enhancement.

 

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Bring Back Romance

Couples tend to think this is a given and once it slips away, is very difficult to get back. Likewise those on the single scene believe initial flirtation will brew the romance automatically.  Wrong.

Use the lockdown as a time to be creative.  So consider wooing your partner by…

  • Making them laugh
  • Share your feelings
  • Rewrite a song with lyrics about them (and yep sing it to them)
  • Poetry – even if its funny
  • Sending them virtual gifts
  • Doing something special
  • Pampering them
  • Being playful, creative with foreplay
  • Try something new in the bedroom

gift.jpg

Make Friends

Most long lasting relationships start with a solid foundation of friendship.  Making friends can be at times difficult on the dating scene, as intentions could be easily misconstrued.  So while we are in a period of “social distancing”, your “getting to know someone better” will be just that….. allowing a friendship to blossom.

Get In Shape and Eat Right

Most of us could use an opportunity to improve our diet and our shape, so use this time to increase your exercise and plan better meals.  Beauty on the outside requires health from within.

workout home.jpeg

Hone In On Your Skills

No one is perfect when it comes to seduction or skill, so use this time to brush up on long overdue learning and refreshers.  Myself….I could sure learn how to dance……

Stay safe and healthy out there!

 

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The Baby Boomer’s Guide to Online Dating

 

Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, and iHeart Radio.

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Health, news, relationships, sex, Valentines

How to Show Love (Without Being Uncomfortable or Awkward)

Valentine’s Day is here again, and expectations are high when it comes to displays of affection.  But for many us, our attempts at being romantic feel awkward and fake.  “I Love You So Much” may not breeze out of our mouths naturally and a poorly executed show of emotion can be worse than no show at all.

So let’s look at some creative ways to show affection that can make a lasting impression….

Don’t use the word “love” if you can’t

Many people will expect the word to be used right out the gate when a relationship hits the “love” level.  Even if you are comfortable with reaching this level, you may have a difficult time saying the word love.

So don’t. Tell them you want to tell them that you “love” them but the 4 letter word doesn’t even begin to describe it.

“I want to tell you ‘I love you’ but it doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel about you…..”

You can also reach for other vocabulary that may include:

  • devoted
  • enchanted
  • infatuated
  • cherish
  • worship

that may be easier to say….

Also telling someone that you are in love with them flows a little smoother than I love you, taking the directness out of the equation.

Valentine’s Day: The Least Liked Holiday of the Year

A picture is worth 1000 words

Don’t worry if you are inept at painting, sketching or doodling.  Fortunately your camera phone can make amazing art….

love rose

Image from Business Insider

 

And if you’re light on creativity, the internet offers tons of content that you can personalize and give to your betrothed.

love hands

Image from mindbodygreen.com

 

Write a small poem (or borrow one)

Poetry helps take the pressure off anything, except for those who can’t write it. So don’t try to be a Whitman, Frost or Dickenson…be you….and make it simple and sweet!

My world was lonely, cold and dark

until you brought it light

I love you more than words can say

you make my heart beam bright……

 

ugh that’s mushy huh….let’s try another…..

 

Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

I can’t write poetry

But I do love you

 

ok, so if poetry isn’t your thing, we have one more option….

How to Give the Perfect First Kiss

Gifts

Tokens of love do not have to be big or expensive (if you found the right partner).  So any of the following can go along way….

  • a bottle of wine (with their name on the label)
  • a playlist of their favorite songs
  • a song dedication to them over the radio
  • a stuffed toy
  • a book
  • a gift certificate
  • a funny knickknack/ desk calendar
  • puppy

No matter what you do, honesty is the best policy.  Not telling someone you love them because you are afraid can be tragic if you both are meant to be. So sometimes explaining your timidness and how you want to express your feelings and can’t may be all they need to hear.

Good luck and Happy Valentine’s Day!

 

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The Baby Boomer’s Guide to Online Dating

 

Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, iHeart Radio and Board Certified Family Physician

Posted in Health, news, sex

Sex Doll “Brothels”….What Are The Risks?

Warning: Graphic Content

As automation displaces workers from their jobs, and social media displaces in-person social behavior, dolls and robots may replace us in the bedroom.

Reports of a Las Vegas sex doll social club have surfaced and have raised a few eyebrows among other things.

Daily Mail reports:

The Las Vegas Sex Dolls Experience prides itself on being the ‘first establishment in Nevada where sex dolls are ready,’ the company states on its social media pages and websites.
But the company’s website also insists: ‘We are not a brothel’.

Allegedly, customers can purchase dolls, and take them for a test run in a private setting.

 

sex doll.jpg

Sex dolls and robots aren’t anything new. The sex toy/tech industry is a mulitibillion dollar empire.

Why is the sex doll industry growing?

Despite the obvious reasons, here are some not-so-obvious ones why sex with dolls/robots is rising in popularity:

  • Less stigma associated with it now than in the past
  • Preferences can be fine tuned
  • Economical, depending on the re-usability
  • Helps avoid having sex with one who could be underage, married, or litigious
  • Offers a means for extramarital sex without it officially being “adultery” for some couples
  • They don’t talk, hence the doll won’t say “no” or “I have a headache”
  • The doll won’t say “ow” thus allowing multiple different positions
  • The myth of it being “STI free”

 

alessandro-male-sexdoll

 

What are the risks of having sex with a doll or robot?

For one, sexually transmitted illness (STI’s) CAN be transmitted if the doll/machine is not cleansed thoroughly.

Secondly, if forceful sex is not checked, chafing and penis “fracture” (which is not a fracture but a severe penile injury) can occur.

Some experts also believe it will accelerate impotence in some as intimacy is lacking.

Finally, a report published in the BMJ suggested that rather than protect women from assault, they could objectify them more, “intensifying existing physical and sexual violence against women and children.”

Since sex dolls and robots can cost well into the thousands, customers may be hesitant to invest in one without knowing they will be satisfied with their purchase.   And “club” owners may find the idea of having very few “live” employees economically advantageous.   Doll/robot shops…or clubs…. might spring up faster than you think……

 

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The Baby Boomer’s Guide to Online Dating

 

Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, and iHeart Radio.

Posted in Beauty, dating, disease, fashion, Health, news, sex

Women Are Digging the Beard….But Only If It’s Clean

Beards are in and ladies will like…..unless they think its dirty and full of “lice.”

A study from the University of Queensland and University of Sterling interviewed 919 heterosexual women and found that they preferred the more masculine looking face (narrow eyes, prominent brow, cut jawline) including a beard, unless they had a personal eversion to ectoparasites such as lice and fleas.  This eversion to critters made them less attracted to a beard.

However those who were less concerned with critters but more concerned with bacteria and viruses, preferred the beard.  Ironic, but in nature hair, such as those in one’s nose, protects one against infectious disease, so instinct may be kicking in.

A Man’s Beard Found to Be Dirtier Than Dog Fur

For those of us who find beards sexy, this study might sway us a tad.

A recent study published in European Radiology found human hair to be dirtier than a dog’s.

Study authors looked at 18 men and 30 dogs and compared the bacterial load in CFUs (colony forming units) from both beards and dog fur.  Then they examined MRI scanners used for both dogs and humans and compared the bacterial load to those only used for humans.

The results were:

OUR STUDY SHOWS A SIGNIFICANTLY HIGHER BACTERIAL LOAD IN SPECIMENS TAKEN FROM MEN’S BEARDS COMPARED WITH DOGS’ FUR (P = 0.036). ALL OF THE MEN (18/18) SHOWED HIGH MICROBIAL COUNTS, WHEREAS ONLY 23/30 DOGS HAD HIGH MICROBIAL COUNTS AND 7 DOGS MODERATE MICROBIAL COUNTS. FURTHERMORE, HUMAN-PATHOGENIC MICROORGANISMS WERE MORE FREQUENTLY FOUND IN HUMAN BEARDS (7/18) THAN IN DOG FUR (4/30), ALTHOUGH THIS DIFFERENCE DID NOT REACH STATISTICAL SIGNIFICANCE (P = 0.074). MORE MICROBES WERE FOUND IN HUMAN ORAL CAVITIES THAN IN DOG ORAL CAVITIES (P < 0.001). AFTER MRI OF DOGS, ROUTINE SCANNER DISINFECTION WAS UNDERTAKEN AND THE CFU FOUND IN SPECIMENS ISOLATED FROM THE MRI SCANNING TABLE AND RECEIVER COILS SHOWED SIGNIFICANTLY LOWER BACTERIA COUNT COMPARED WITH “HUMAN” MRI SCANNERS (P < 0.05).
Hence bearded men harbor “significantly higher burden of microbes and more human-pathogenic strains than dogs.”

Last year, researchers out of Manchester University found 47% of beards tested contained fecal matter that contained deadly pathogens.

This study was also coauthored by Fragrance Direct, and found despite cleaning habits of study participants, enterococcus was found on 47% of beards swabbed and cultured.

Enterococcus is a bacteria commonly found in the colon and feces and has over 17 types, the most common being E. faecalis and E. faecium. These may cause infections in the urinary tract, abdomen, pelvis, wound and even blood (sepsis).

 

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This study followed one done in 2015 by Quest Diagnostics in New Mexico, in which a microbiologist swabbed beards and grew out cultures finding bacteria that commonly colonize our colon.

Bacteria like to hide on the skin but need cover, and beard hair offers a nice warm, moist shelter.  Oral sex increases one’s chance of being “contaminated” with pelvic and rectal bacteria.

A spokesman for Fragrance Direct states, “Caring for your beard is essential for its health, helping it stay fresh to keep the bacteria at bay.  Everyone knows to shampoo their hair, but beards need some attention too. Men should use beard shampoo when they shower, along with conditioner afterwards.”

So the next time you run your fingers through a man’s beard, sanitize them afterwards….

 

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The Baby Boomer’s Guide to Online Dating

Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, and iHeart Radio.

Posted in Beauty, Health, medications, news, sex

Testosterone Therapy: New Guidelines Released

Millions of men take testosterone supplements each year in the U.S.  Low testosterone, or “Low T”, can manifest in a variety of symptoms including:

  • fatigue
  • erectile dysfunction
  • depression
  • lack of sex drive
  • muscle loss
  • loss of strength
  • decrease muscle strength
  • loss of fertility
  • osteoporosis (decrease bone mass)
  • and may contribute to many other issues.

 

testosterone

The most popular forms of testosterone are injections and gels. Pill forms are available but are not as effective.

Testosterone slowly decreases with age at a rate of 1.6 % per year beginning in one’s 30’s. A man with significant testosterone loss, however could  signify a more serious health issue such as diabetes.  So many physicians don’t hesitate when it comes to supplementing this vital hormone.

However, its not without its risks.   Risks of testosterone therapy include:

  • Increasing risk of prostate size
  • risk of prostate cancer
  • polycythemia (increase red blood cell levels)
  • mood issues
  • sleep apnea
  • acne
  • and multiple studies have found it increases risk of heart attacks and stroke.

 

This week the American College of Physicians released new guidelines on testosterone replacement.

They suggest to only use testosterone therapy when treating sexual dysfunction but not for the other aforementioned conditions as the evidence is not supportive.

Recommendation 1a:

ACP suggests that clinicians discuss whether to initiate testosterone treatment in men with age-related low testosterone with sexual dysfunction who want to improve sexual function (conditional recommendation; low-certainty evidence). The discussion should include the potential benefits, harms, costs, and patient’s preferences.

Recommendation 1b:

ACP suggests that clinicians should reevaluate symptoms within 12 months and periodically thereafter. Clinicians should discontinue testosterone treatment in men with age-related low testosterone with sexual dysfunction in whom there is no improvement in sexual function (conditional recommendation; low-certainty evidence).

Recommendation 1c:

ACP suggests that clinicians consider intramuscular rather than transdermal formulations when initiating testosterone treatment to improve sexual function in men with age-related low testosterone, as costs are considerably lower for the intramuscular formulation and clinical effectiveness and harms are similar.

Recommendation 2:

ACP suggests that clinicians not initiate testosterone treatment in men with age-related low testosterone to improve energy, vitality, physical function, or cognition (conditional recommendation; low-certainty evidence).

They also prefer intramuscular forms over transdermal preparations due to cost.

Testosterone therapy linked to blood clots

In 2016 researchers found a 63% increase risk of blood clots within the first 6 months of testosterone therapy.  These are deadly as they increase risk of heart disease, stroke, pulmonary embolism and organ damage.  They form in veins, deep veins, and thus have an obstructed path to reach vital organs and prevent blood flow.  This is not the first time venous thromboembolism (VTE) has been linked to testosterone therapy. Back in 2014 the FDA recommended warning labels on testosterone products.

According to researchers at Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai in New York City state the overall risk is still low, one case per 1000 men a year, but could be of huge concern for those at risk of blood clots.  Lead researcher, Dr.Carlos Martinez, states, “Risk peaks rapidly in the first six months of treatment and lasts for about nine months, and fades gradually thereafter.” So a promising finding is the risk falls as time passes since therapy.

  • Risk factors for VTE include:
  • genetic predisposition
  • prior blood clots
  • cancer
  • prolonged immobility (long flights, hospitalization stays)
  • pregnancy (women)
  • smoking
  • and of course risk increases with age.

Study author Dr. Mark Creager states, “My advice is to review the patient’s underlying risk factors for VTE, and weigh that risk against the potential benefit of testosterone therapy,” Creager said. “These individuals should at least be made aware of the fact that their risk would be even higher with testosterone.”

This study was published online 11/30/2016 in the BMJ (British Medical Journal)

 

Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, iHeart Radio and is a Board Certified Family Physician

Posted in Beauty, disease, Health, news, sex

Bigger the Breasts? Bigger the Cold…..

For those of us who think big-breasted women are lucky, think again.  A study published in Archives of Sexual Behavior finds those with larger breasts may suffer a cold longer than those who are smaller cupped.

Authors looked at 163 young, non-pregnant, non-lactating, Caucasian Polish female students, and after an extensive study design with surveys, hormone levels and measurements concluded that larger breast size correlated negatively with respiratory health, “breast size was positively related to respiratory infections and two of its components, average duration of illness and frequency of antibiotic use (Table 1, Fig. 2), indicating that women with larger breasts experienced longer episodes of respiratory diseases and took antibiotics more frequently.”

This mirrored previous studies linking large breast size to diabetes and breast cancer.

One would think that large breasts would put a little more distance between others but that didn’t seem to correlate.  Some hypothesize that the fat stores decrease one’s immunity and can increase antibiotic resistance.  And some believe the breasts provide a trampoline for pathogens to bounce from.

Should Large-Breasted Women have a Reduction to Protect their Health?

Moreover, us large breasted women are always distracted but activities such as straightening our bra straps, covering up when we bend forward, and losing our keys.  It’s difficult to wash your hands thoroughly in the sink when you can’t see them.

Hence, women like myself can overcome this handicap by storing hand sanitizer in our bras.

What is the average breast size in the US?

#Shirtsoff

 

According to babeappeal.com, the average size is 34 DD.  They also list on their site, how countries differ in breast size:

Average cup size in Australia: D
Average cup size in Brazil: B
Average cup size in Canada: DD
Average cup size in France: A
Average cup size in Germany: D
Average cup size in Ireland: D
Average cup size in Italy: A
Average cup size in Japan: A
Average cup size in Mexico: B
Average cup size in New Zealand: D
Average cup size in Russia: B
Average cup size in Singapore: < A
Average cup size in Spain: C
Average cup size in UK: D
Average cup size in USA (Caucasian): > DDD
Average cup size in USA (non-Caucasian): DD

Why Do Breasts Droop Over Time?

As obesity and BMI’s rise, so can cup sizes as well as certain health risks. Bigger does not always mean better…..

 

Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, and iHeart Radio.

Posted in Health, news, sex, Sports

Concussions Can Lead to Erectile Dysfunction

A recent study has found former NFL players to be at risk for erectile dysfunction if they sustained a concussion during sports.

Harvard researchers looked at 3,400 former professional football players and found in those who sustained some sort of head trauma, 18% had low testosterone (Low T), 23% reported erectile dysfunction (ED) and 10% had both low T and ED.

The cause of the low testosterone is not clear, but researchers believe it could be due to damage to the pituitary gland.  If the gland is damaged, signals to the testes where testosterone is produced could be disrupted.

testosterone-production.gif

Authors write:

One possible explanation, the research team said, could be injury to the brain’s pituitary gland that sparks a cascade of hormonal changes culminating in diminished testosterone and ED. This biological mechanism has emerged as a plausible explanation in earlier studies that echo the current findings, such as reports of higher ED prevalence and neurohormonal dysfunction among people with head trauma and traumatic brain injury, including military veterans and civilians with head injuries.

The more head injuries, the higher the risk of sexual side effects noted.  Medical providers need to be aware that among the issues that could arise down the line in those who sustain trauma to the head (i.e. headaches, mood swings, insomnia, depression), sexual dysfunction may need to be screened as well.

Could Dementia and CTE be Prevented with Oxygen Therapy?

 

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Are Many Athletes at Risk for Depression?

 

ED Linked to Heart Disease

For years, men have voiced frustration when their medical providers insisted on a cardiac workup prior to initiating an ED prescription.  Some thought it was because they’d have a heart attack during sex.  But it’s not.  Erectile dysfunction is a vascular issue, and if the vessels of the penis are compromised, how does one know his heart vessels aren’t as well?

Now in a recent study from John Hopkins School of Medicine found an increase risk of stroke, heart attack and cardiac arrests in those men who suffered from erectile dysfunction.  Study author, Michael Blaha, professor of Medicine, states, “Our findings suggest that clinicians should perform further targeted screening in men with erectile dysfunction, regardless of other cardiac risk factors and should consider managing any other risk factors — such as high blood pressure or cholesterol — that much more aggressively.”

 

Last December, a study published in the Journal of Vascular Medicine, found the same risk factors leading to erectile dysfunction are also culprits in heart disease.

Risk factors shared by both erectile dysfunction and heart disease include:

  • High Blood Pressure
  • High Cholesterol
  • Diabetes
  • Smoking
  • Men over age 45
  • Physical inactivity
  • Stress
  • Obesity
  • Family history of heart disease

 

Last year, researchers from Mount Sinai Medical Center, Florida International University and Baptist Health South Florida reviewed multiple studies and found a link between erectile dysfunction and compromised blood vessels whose endothelium (lining) demonstrated impaired vessel relaxation. This is necessary for both erections as well as blood flow to the heart and rest of the body.

Moreover carotid media-intima thickness, a marker of atherosclerosis, appeared to be correlated to erectile dysfunction as well.

Both studies remind us that if one bodily function is impaired, other organs may be quietly suffering the same impairment.

I like to credit the pharmaceutical companies that created erectile dysfunction drugs with saving millions of men’s lives as:

  1. Men who would refuse to come into any doctor’s office now had an incentive to, resulting in a long-overdue check-up
  2. Those who saw providers who required an EKG or diabetic screening, and unknowingly suffered from a serious cardiac risk factor, could now be diagnosed.
  3. ED drugs allowed those men who couldn’t enjoy sex to now get some much-needed physical activity

Young men aren’t immune to cardiovascular disease and need to be screened as well if they have issues starting or maintaining erections.

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Daliah Wachs, MD, FAAFP is a nationally syndicated radio personality on GCN Network, KDWN, and iHeart Radio.